Why I Downloaded An App to Find New Friends When I Already Have Too Many

Alison Rice


I am that frustrating friend who needs a month’s notice to turn up anywhere. My Outlook calendar is my life and without it, I’d probably sit at home in the corner wondering what my life’s purpose is. It’s actually a wonder I still have friends who put up with my long lead planning needs but what I can say is honestly is when I am there, I’m truly there and very present. I’ve made it my life’s mission not to cancel on my friends when we do have plans, especially because they’ve been patient enough to wait a month or more.  

So to the outside, it probably makes no sense that I downloaded an app to find new friends. But there’s a good reason!

Most of us have different pockets of friends or friendship groups—school friends, uni friends, work friends, and our partner’s friends. The interesting thing is, they’re all circumstantial. We’re taught to make friends at school, and we need to at work to stay sane, but we can only pick from what is available to us. As we grow up, our interests change. We mature at different rates. Sometimes we’re left wondering—why am I friends with her again? And if I took away the history, would this even be a friendship?

So I got to thinking, what if I could pick new friends based only on our common interests and personalities—true compatibility. Doesn’t matter where we work, or who we know. A clean slate. A bit like Tinder, but for finding your ride or die. Cue the thought: 

And of course it exists. Meet Hey Vina. An app dedicated to making it easier for smart, interesting women to find each other online, and then connect offline.

On signing up it aggregated information from my Facebook profile, and then I took a quiz which I actually found to be a bit of self-exploration in itself. Indoors or outdoors? Wine or coffee? Introvert or extrovert? And then my favourite: Describe yourself in five emojis. That was hard.

Then it’s swipe city! I am married so I missed out on the Tinder fun, and now get to live out my swipe left and right dreams but with non-creepy people of the opposite sex. Whose profiles read delightful things like: “Looking for a weekend gallery buddy” and “if you like wine and cheese nights on the lounge, I’m your girl!” Heaven.

When I did swipe right, the pressure to bring good banter was real. I felt nervous and like I had to step my chat game up. Like hold on! I am usually funnier than this!

What it comes down to for me I want to know more great women. Women I can learn from, grow with and who will challenge me to think differently. 

I have my first lady date slated in my busy calendar in a month from now, so I’ll be sure to let you know how it goes. I have to admit, I’m a bit nervous! I hope we’re a good match.

Would you download a friendship app to find new friends? Tell us why or why not in the comments below and shop a cheese wine hamper for your next lady date!

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